Monday, September 8, 2008

Josh Beckett: Your fly is down.

Beckett brought his A-game on Friday, and that's perfectly cool. I'm just wondering why no one is making a big deal of the fact that he was pitching with his fly down? Seriously, no one thought to tell him? Or perhaps he noticed when he got to the mound, but he thought to himself, "Fuck that. I aint lettin' no little zipper control ME. Bitch stays down." And then he proceeded to kick some ass. That's the most likely scenario I can come up with. Of course, he followed up his 5 innings by setting fire to his pants for disobedience. That's just the kind of fiery, crazy guy Josh Beckett is in my mind. The other option is he was doing it to psych out the Rangers... they come up to bat, and see Beckett. Fear enters their mind. Then they notice that his fly is down, and silently start to giggle to themselves. In that short time span, as they were giggling, Beckett has managed to embarrass them (preferrably on three pitches). Yes, that is also an acceptable scenario.
(photo from

Wakefield was... not good. Not even close to good. Saturday was the biggest suckfest I've seen out of the Red Sox for a while. It's like Munchkin was trying to prove a point by not getting a hit. "Not MVP, huh? I'll show you fuckers how badly you lose when I aint hitting. Just you wait." And we waited. We waited for our pitchers to stop bleeding runs, and we waited for our hitters to put together a solid 10-run rally. But Pedroia stood firm, and hit not, and the team lost in an embarrassing fashion.

Luckily for us, the almighty short one decided that everyone had seen the error of their ways and went back to putting on an offensive show. Actually, Sunday was more like an offensive movie trailer, starring little Pedey himself. Just a brief glimpse of what he is capable of. Sure enough, we (and Byrd) kicked ass instead of getting our asses kicked.

A giant, happy welcome back to Mikey and Frankie! Honestly, it's not as if I minded their replacement players because they did really well during the injuries, but I love having these guys healthy again... I love watching Mikey do everything he does, and watching Frankie run is a thing of confusing beauty... exactly how DOES he make all of his limbs flail so much while he's moving so slowly? Amazing. Amazing happiness abounds.

(Devil) Rays are coming to town, and if we could just keep up with the pattern of sweeping them at the Fens, we should be OK, and in first place when they crawl back out of Boston. Oh please let the boys keep up the pattern, if only for this week (please let them only keep it up for this week!)...

In news from other sports... Tom Brady-gone for the season. I know I don't know very much about football, but I know this hurts the Pats. I also kind of see it as football karma. He didn't practice at all this off season, and he comes back and gets hurt before halftime of the first game. The football gods are not happy with your choices Tom. Maybe next year you can appease them better. Good luck, Matt Cassel, you're going to need it.

It's Monday. I'm tired. Today can't possibly move fast enough.

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