He was great last night. One mistake. That's all. Just one mistake, and we end up handing him another no decision when he clearly deserved the win (IMO). Not a single person could get a hit with runners in scoring position? Pedroia, love, what's going on? You've picked the wrong time to start going cold. Ortiz, why don't you look as intimidating at the plate? When you get that look on your face, you hit. Get that look back. You know the look. Don't make me try to describe it. Asshat... forget it. It's the second half. We already got way more out of you than I ever expected. C+, you earned your nickname last night. Nothing spectacular. Lowrider, maybe I should have let Beckett set you on fire. Captain... you're making me cry. Ellsbury, what did I tell you about trying to steal off of lefties? You haven't been getting good jumps. Just stay still. Coco.... yeah. The only ones that have any excuse are Mikey Lowell and David Ortiz. They're dealing with legitimate injuries. The rest of you just need to not carry the suck around on days when the Commander's on the mound.
Beckett's slated to start next Monday (barring any kind of completely expected rotation changes). I'm going to be at the game next Monday. Now, my little stupids, by next Monday, I expect that you all remember what it's like to get Beckett a win. Got it? You better.
I can't get too mad at Fetus for the loss. He had a bad game. He had very bad timing picking when he would have that bad game, but it's still just one. I covered the inevitability of bad games yesterday. I still think Fetus is crying inside that they didn't let him wear a dress for rookie initiation day. He seemed really upset about it. Shake it off, Justin. You can go home and wear one of your wife's dresses.
Wakefield starts tonight. Keep your fingers and toes crossed that the knuckler keeps the Rays crossed up. Tim, you have your mission. Please please please don't implode tonight.
Meanwhile, let Paps keep complaining that he's only human. We know you're human, Jonathan. Robots don't get drunk.
Or do they...?