Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Jonathan Tyler Lester: There Goes My Hero ...

I say it all the time, but I truly mean it... I love that kid. He's been absolutely clutch for us this year. Clutch, I say! (photo from Sports Illustrated.com... and yes I'm aware it was from his no-hitter and not last night's game. Shut up)

After walking the first batter, I wasn't expecting a dominating performance out of Jon last night, but he continues to defy my expectations. He's just that good. He ended up going 7 2/3rds, then handing the ball off to our insane closer. Patmybum responded to a question from that whore Heidi Watney after the game, and I believe his answer went something like this, "Cinco Ocho don't know how he do, he just do." I wonder how long Paps has been holding on to that one? How long has that quotable gem been floating around in that big, rednecky head of his? Listen, I love the guy as our closer, but the things he says and does makes me honestly question his sanity. So, please, keep the microphones out of his face. I'd like to keep a shred of respect for him.

Munchkin does not like hitting in the 2-spot. Francona is an idiot for moving him. The kid was raking everything in sight, so he moves him up in the order, and he stops hitting. Sigh.... oh, Tito, you fool. Why do you consistently make the wrong decision about what to do with a guy when he starts hitting? I just... I just don't know about you, Francona.

Kazerud may have hit a home run last night. It's entirely possible. He's so damn quiet, I sometimes have to remind myself that he's there. Even when he's doing well, I almost convince myself that it's the other guys on the team doing what he did. I'm not sure if that makes sense to anyone. Considering I haven't eaten breakfast yet, and I'm super hungry, consider any logical, grammatically correct sentence a blessing.

Anyway, yesterday was consecutive sellout 456. They had nice little ceremonies since the team overtook the Cleveland Indians as the all-time consecutive sellout champions (Cleveland had 455 consecutive sellouts). My issue was this: why didn't they have the four guys who have been around during that whole span on the "Thank You" video? They had Varitek and Papi, but they didn't find it necessary to include Timlin and Wakefield? C'mon! No excuse. Both guys are healthy and on the active roster. I'm sure Tim would have loved to say thank you to the fans. For that matter, I can envision a smiling Mike thanking the fans for not making him retire (I love the Admiral). Hell, they could have had Mike and Tim standing next to each other, arms around one another's shoulders, looking into the camera and saying "Thank you fans, for hanging out with the old guys!" And that would have made me smile, and it would have been somewhat poignant. There are only four guys on the team who have been around since 2003. Let them thank everyone, and then give the camera to Paps.

For that matter, what do you think Beckett would have said? I imagine that he would have said something like, "Screw the fans. You fuckers should be thanking ME! Now get out of my way, I'm going huntin'." Of course, they would have to cut that out of the video because of Beckett not showering the fans with love and attention, but don't doubt that it would have been funny. Really, John Henry and the owners are nice and all, but John Henry kind of creeps me out, and I don't really care what he has to say. I want to hear from the guys that I've been watching for x-amount of consecutive games (listen, math... not my strong point this early, ok? You solve for x).

Regardless of how many improvements I think that video could have had, I thought it was a nice gesture. So tonight we've got Daisuke going up against Scott Kazmir. I'm expecting Bay to rake him tonight, since he IS made up of half of Kazmir, he should know what he's going to throw.

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