Not Swept: One Out Of Three... Aint... Bad?

Hi! I'm back from my little impromptu vacation during which I did nothing but bake cookies and do laundry. Exciting life, I know. It's just that people can't get enough of the cookies so I'm forced into slave labor. It happens to everyone, right? Wait, that's not all I did. I watched baseball, too. Oh my, what a disaster Pittsburg turned into.

The whole series was honestly pretty shameful. Marco Scutaro, I'm going to have Mike Timlin punch you so hard in the spine, you'll be temporarily paralyzed. Kevin Youkilis, I'm not so sure you made a single play at third ALL WEEKEND. I was watching you. It was ugly. Actually, everyone's fielding was ugly. Scutaro, Reddick, Cameron.... guys, come on! We had something like six errors in the last four games, and that's not even accounting for the misplays that weren't called errors. I know you all are tired and the ASB is coming up, but you're not there yet! So cut the shit and field your positions. My God, you were all terrible.

Luckily, by the grace of whatever, they did manage to salvage the last game of the series, but just barely. It seemed kind of apparent to me that Ronald McDonald's cousin James really wanted to decapitate our Munchkin. Three times he threw up and in on Pedroia. I don't know what point he was trying to make, but you do not maim the Munchkin! We sort of need him.

Our terrible defense was offset by the even worse defense of the Pirates. It's troubling that we almost couldn't score runs without their help. Only one run was earned, the rest were handed to us. I'll willingly take them, but I sincerely hope that the Sox re-find the delightful swagger they possessed when they won 11 out of 12 against our ALE foes.

It's really hard not to harp on the negatives when they just played so poorly in their last two series and fell out of first in the division. I think I've done enough harping. Except for this... seriously, JD? How do you foul a ball off your own face? You're ridiculous! Ok, now the harping is over. We've got today off to reflect on the absurdity of the last week, and then we march Beckett's sick face out to square off against Cliff Lee. Frightening? For us, sure, but I think that Josh kept himself out of the lineup intentionally so he could face Cliff Lee on Tuesday. It's all in his master plan, folks. Trust in Josh.... or he might hurt you.