Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Hank Steinbrenner: So Much More Amusing Than His Brother

I got back from my (extended) lunch break, and got back to work (surfing the 'net) when I found this.

And then everyone around me wanted to know why I was laughing so loudly. (OK, they didn't hear me laughing...)

Really, Hankster? REALLY? You're going with injuries? You're going to use that one? Oh man, thank you for being so much more amusing than your brother! This really made me smile, and I'll explain why.

1) Unlike his daddy, he seems perfectly ok with third place. I can see the new "Yankee tradition" forming right now...
2) "Considering the injuries and what he's done with the bullpen without Joba, it speaks volumes to what he's capable of doing and how smart he is." You do remember who took Joba out of the pen, right Hankster? By the way, what exactly is it that my boy Joe Girardi's done with the bullpen that's so impressive?
3) "Chamberlain had become the most dominant starting pitcher in baseball..." - FALSE
In his last 10 games (out of 12 starts) he is 3-1 with a 2.61 ERA. Now, Cliff Lee, for example is 6-1 with a 2.33 ERA in the same time frame. Roy Halladay is 5-3 with a 2.18 ERA in his last 10. Or Brandon Webb, who's 6-1 with a 2.57 ERA. Even Jon Lester is 6-1 with a 2.92 ERA in his last 10. Oh, how about C.C. Sabbathia, who in his last 10 games is 7-0 with a 1.69 ERA? I'd say that's slightly more dominant than Joba's silly little numbers. Hank, do you even follow baseball?
4) "Wang has been a 19-game winner every year" - FALSE
You can't just pick and choose the years you want to include. He DID pitch in '05... and he only won 8 games. Nice try though.
5) "If the Red Sox lost (Josh) Beckett and (Jon) Lester, the whole national media would be crying about it." - FALSE
Hey... Hank? I don't know if you were aware of this, but we lost Josh Beckett at the beginning of the season. We've also had injuries to ALL OF OUR OTHER STARTERS (with the exception of Jon Lester... I'm going to knock on wood now). Including... oh, what's his name.... that guy who has 13 wins and an ERA of 2.90 for the season? Oh yeah! Dice-motherf&^%ing-K. And while we fielded all of these injuries, no one in the media so much as shed a tear for us. I don't think they like us so much.
6) "No team I've ever seen in baseball has been decimated like this." Apparently you weren't watching the 2006 Red Sox? Yeah, no one feels bad about your injuries.

"We're going to win it next year."

The universe has officially flipped upside down. Amazing.

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